They Say - Cubbiebear

I didn’t mean for it to be so bad

I got lost in my mistakes

And judgments from you I feared to take

Every day the beauty in your face drained

And said time with me is a cancer

With all the answers that I can’t make

To cure your anxiety, hearing you lied to me

And I don’t love you, to my face

You cried to me every day it felt like

I found fail forever and I held tight

So I could fall with you with my eyes closed

And no close to love life

But this fall has changed my autumns

Now wet skin is touched by cold wind

I stayed in my side in bed still tossing

Arms hugging close but no wins

Your lips went from soft to just talking

My hands place where you’ve last been

And it’s freezing more thoughts tease me

With warmth and what was now lost friend

Love changed her style to punk

The pain was played as a wilder trump

So while I’d say you could claim as a front for attention

Now listen and get what you want

All eyes and ears are on me for proof

I watch in dilemma of who thinks what’s truth

And respond to your blame of neglect by use of this time

All I’ll do is talk about you

Cause I’ve made mistakes but I’ve claimed

Everything without guard that I’ve explained

To clean a mess between two that’s made alone

With hate you fail to help her do the same

Maybe I’m an animal worth hurting

A kicked Pit raised into an ugly person

Who lusts too much for life that lost worth

And began to snap at the monotony of searching

It only felt love with one but doubt

Placed your hand with worth of putting down

So it shakes when you open your mouth

Afraid it’s wrong it’ll never make a sound

See your touch wasn’t placed to pet

In fear it roams and tries to forget

With any attention but kicks at best seen astray

Chewing the collar off its neck

You can’t blame someone’s life for flirting

When your life’s spent building a case to hurt them

Neglecting emotions in secret you search and stare dead

Who sounds like an uglier person?

When I pass my puppy at the door to kiss your face

You stay reacting sore and empty waste

So I hate myself for every day

I can’t place why you hate me more

Fine, maybe I’m a guilty person

Maybe my faults made me worth searching

Maybe my blame is just, I’m just a shame

Or I lust too much you’ll never trust the same

Maybe I’m too old and lost in fear

Of past faults and what they’ve cost

I guard what’s little left with awe

But returning tears will blind anything you saw

Alone in judgment a room of nothing

I sit and think, alive in discomfort

Isn’t it something ironic function

To kill my pride I drink to karma’s crumbling

By the time that all done is mentioned

I consciously accepted the attention

Say I shouldn’t stray if I felt that pain, I shoulda left

Your face formed my strength to walk away I guess

I’m a snake personified

A feeling of never, hate in human form

Of grip handles too late, a living lie

A piece of shit to knock spit on a heart to dismantle

A face to target why

All past anxiety in need of new paths to channel

A place, for blaming eyes, to crane your neck

Your wings need the wind from a scandal

I’ll take it, exemplify

Frame it in music and use it displayed on this mantle

Our hate, immortalized, the time that we waste

Put flames on both ends of my candle

Today, Josh’ll die, this monster won’t tame

My inner child shakes and I ramble

Afraid, claiming fine, but a lie

Like everything you said I made in examples

It’s my mistake, I’m vile

I’m past the pain, unworth the while

A snake who tries it shoulda walked away

But I’d kill to see you smile

Alone I stumble no home, impatient

Hands that touched you in fists with blame

Burning my thoughts, judgments and shame

I see every day from your face, I hate it

This is how I’ll be remembered, tasteless

Everything I might’ve done, erased

Till who I am’s ugly a cancer a cage to age

And falling for always and crack to your hatred

Hope you found holiday’s home complacent

His touch can hush any angst, feel safe

I spend these days alone pen to this page

Afraid on the stage I’ll shake confiding my pain

Remembering times you were with me

When I fought for what I’m not worth forgiving

Shape of your face, soft is now changed

Lost in the ways you’ll learn to forget me

Everyday ugly kickstarting my heart but I’m curt

Even worse the smile grudging my heart, what I’m worth

You keep judging and charging the dark, kicking dirt

Now I’m hungry with scars that start em, getting worse

It’s likely the rage in my face that’ll surface

crooked, worthless

You place with such hate, I take while she searches

Wilting we both lay and flirt anxious with purpose

They say, they say, they say, they say, to let you

Say, they say, they say, they say to let you

Say, they say, they say, they say to let you

Say, they say, they say, they say to let you go