The Cardiologist - Dom Mclennon, Kevin Abstract

Zonin' off melatonin

Shit got me fucking goin'

Thinking of hearts I’ve molded, then the delicate one I’m now holding

Fix the shells that are broken, they say my hands were golden

But these gloves are blood-stained

I feel like a monster watching them open up, 'til I seal all of these cuts

It’s a race against time and sometimes I’m not fast enough

You win some, you lose some, they say

Though the stakes get raised when a life is put in the way

Don’t know why I choose to play

Wanted to be a hero

Didn’t figure what life is like working at ground zero

Mama told me that God has his eye on the sparrow

But what about us, the mere mortals?

Medicated to a portal of an apathetic shell

The surface handles well, but I need a cardiologist so I can feel myself

Started with insomnia, now my mind’s on the rim

Spiraling towards oxy’s, opiates, and some Klonopin

I’m just trying to change my ways, my ways, my ways

But it just stays the same like a heartbeat

Like a heartbeat, like a heartbeat, like a heartbeat

I’m just trying to change my ways, my ways, my ways, my ways

But it just stays the same like a heartbeat

Llike a heartbeat, like a heartbeat, like a heartbeat, baby

Gotta start deciding

They say greed is evil, but depression is a modern sin

Mind racing, not sure if it’s the beginning or end

Of my thoughts, going a mile a minute

Tryin' to change how I’m living

But can’t make stable decisions

Mind edgin' at the point of tippin'

'Til it’s time for work, I gotta be a slate

And this apathy and numbness makes me perform great

I’m praised for these calculations that I’ve been forced to make

By keeping myself rational inside of a sedated state

So around and around we go, the vicious cycle

My service is a favor and these people feel entitled

A sole responsibility, just to perform

Don’t know why my heroics turned to contemplations, I’m torn

No man can be a god, I don’t deserve to play it

Looking at these patients, EKG is losing patience

There’s a party in my head and they’re pissing in the basement

Emotions I’ve repressed begin to show their ugly faces

It’s nails on the chalkboard of my sanity, scraping

Up my empathy, maestro of life, creating symphonies

Upon the epiphany, the human condition ain’t worth conditioning

Cause nobody is listening

Self prognosis, beyond me

A bit of addiction tossed in with DID

Sorry to say, just a product of a society

Compliantly using our anxiety

As a means for addiction, you fit the description

Come take the prescription, we promise to fix this

But I’m part of the business, so riddle me this

What does a man with both hands tied behind his convictions

Do to perform surgery?

If he does it for others, I hope that shit work for me

I say, oh, can you hear me?

Can you see me?

I say, ooh, can you hear me?

Can you see me?

Ah, ain’t no

Ah-ah, ain’t no

Oh, yeah, ain’t no

Ain’t no

The room is closing in and I can barely breathe

The red on the walls will never let me leave

The man behind the wall will never let me down

And there’s been moments I was hoping you would still be 'round

I can be a really shitty time for you to pass these out

To all your patients with intentions of us passing out on couches

I’d rather be at my step daddy’s house;

the mattress where I lay my head

Jamming out to cashing out the classics

My ways, my ways, my ways, my ways

Like a heartbeat, like a heartbeat

Like a heartbeat, oh

I’m just trying to change my ways, my ways, my ways

But they just stay the same like a heartbeat

Like a heartbeat, like a heartbeat, oh

Ooh, I say like a heartbeat

Da-da, mm, da-da da-da, mm

Da-da da-da, mm, da-da, mm

Da-da da-da, mm, oh

Like a heartbeat, like a heartbeat

Like a heartbeat