Ode to the Authentically Desperate - I Am King

This plastic tree stands still alone

Lit up to the ceiling with hope

Clock ticks cut through the silent chill

Patiently waiting for you to come home

Hours are devoured by the pacing

Through the patience I’m wearing thin

With every step I take in

This cold and bitter reality that’s breaking my heart

Didn’t want to say it but I knew from the start

I wish I knew what you were thinking

I didn’t know you were sinking.

Looking back on it all, I see something was

wrong

I’m the best at playing dumb But I’m the worst at moving on

This lack of sleep drives the panic into lunacy

And I feel my lungs start to collapse.

Running on empty

, After the drive we’re taken up into a room

Where nightmare meets reality.

And It hits me so hard

That I fall through the floor

I’m not alive anymore

What the hell is it all for?

It’s worthless

What did i do to deserve this?

I lost you and all i got was gifts.

What a merry fuckin christmas from hell.

I wish I knew what you were thinking.

I didn’t know you were sinking

Looking back on it all, I see something was wrong.

I’m the best at playing dumb

But I’m the worst at moving on

All the years roll past

Too fast.

Still your memory never fades.

It seems like just yesterday

We’d drive your truck

Up to the mountains

If I could turn all the clocks back

You know I’d do it all again.

All I want for christmas is…

I wish I knew what you were thinking

I didn’t know you were sinking.

Looking back on it all, I see something was

wrong

I’m the best at playing dumb

But I’m the worst at moving on