Bed o' Roses No.9 - Ian Dury, The Blockheads

I’ve done a lot of things I wished I hadn’t

There’s other things I never hope to do

But sliding off the map in both directions

Is the sorry mess I made of knowing you

I’ve seen a lot of things I wished I hadn’t

There’s other things I never hope to see

But no one left alive could paint the picture

Of the mess that knowing you has made of me

I knew it wouldn’t be a bed of roses

I’ve seen the bloody grind that love entails

But one door shuts and then another closes

And now I’m on a bloody bed of nails

Been told a lot of things I wished I hadn’t

There’s other things I never want to know

But sliding off the scale of least remembrance

Is the way you chose to tell me where to go

I’ve been a lot of things I wished I hadn’t

There’s other things I never hope to be

But no one left alive could tell the story

Of what I was once you’d got done with me

I knew it might turn out to be a schtumer

Nothing would surprise me anymore

You robbed me of my natural sense of humour

And then you nailed my bollocks to the door

I knew it might turn out to be a schtumer

Nothing would surprise me anymore

You robbed me of my natural sense of humour

And nailed my poor cojones to the door