Alright - Jarv

So recently I had a thing with this chick

She was built like a brick shit-house, dumb as a brick

I really thought I liked her, but I really must admit

I don’t really think I did, I just liked giving her love

We were chilling non-stop for just over a month

That’s not a long time, but still, it was enough

For me to become well-aware she was just another sleazy-ass (what?!)

Dumb slag, bag of dung, conceded-ass raggamuff

Batter up, ‘bout to hit it out the park- MISS

This woman took a shit upon my heart- BITCH

She’s a man-eater, oh, the broad’s slick

Just another initial upon a long list

Yeah, I lied when you asked how many women I’d been with

You’re gonna have to add a couple extra hands

I’ve had many before you and I’ll have many after

Not saying I’m the shit, not claiming to be the man, I’m just saying

Listen, you may not be as special as you think

And I know that’s what you think ‘cause you don’t think about much

It sucks the way it turned out, I know baby, it’s tough

I went on tour for ten days and you couldn’t wait to get stuffed

I’m usually not the type to gripe or hold a grudge

But saying sorry was the least ya' coulda done

Instead, you decided you would try and make me feel like I was crazy

Because I politely asked you what was up- Yup

And then she sends me a pic of that new kid she’s with

Thinking it would make me jealous and pissed- Well it did

But still, I’m not about to give the bitch the satisfaction

Of knowing I give a fuck about who she interacts with

I bask in a haze of love and hate coagulating

I hate your fucking attitude but, babe, you’re rather banging

With your newly pierced nips and your platinum died hair

You can quit watching my story, stupid bitch- You think I care?

(Yes)

I know that I’ve been saying that she’s dumb and that it’s typical

But when it comes to being dumb this cunt is on the pinnacle

Oh wait I shouldn’t say that, the C-word offends her

Why am I even talking about this cunt?

I can’t remember

One time waking up, dude, she had me weak

She actually asked me if hippos had teeth

Yo, what do you mean?

Please tell me that you’re kidding

I know you must be thinking, «wow, she sounds really witty»

But wait, I got some more- One night when she was over

She said she wanted to play some video games and I said, «oh word?»

Heck yeah is what I thought initially but no, sir

She didn’t know how to hold an N64 controller

So I showed her the right way- Of course she got offended

I might have told a joke- Of course she didn’t get it

She said that I was crazy, I proceeded laughing

«How is it my fault that you don’t understand sarcasm?»

And how’s about that time you said that Hannah was a slut

And you would both be at this party and you wanted to fuck her up

And I said, «no, you really shouldn’t, c’mon chill, don’t stress»

And then a week later on instagram, you say you’re BFFs?

Ahh yes, of course- Hey, whenever you feel the need

You can grab your bottle of lube and clean your lipstick off my sheets

Am I being too harsh?

Am I being too mean?

If you didn’t do me like you did I wouldn’t be

You see, she’s just another zombie- Little dumb blondie

Try to watch a movie, but she never stops talking

You came and got your ring- I gave away your watch

Looking basic in my driveway drinking an iced coffee

Go and find a hobby- Superficial, snobby-

Hoes, don’t ya' know play the role of the prom queen

I musta' been caught up in all of the sucking and swallowing

‘Cause otherwise these dumb sluts got nothing to offer me

Obviously, I’m not talking about all women

I respect women- I just don’t respect you

You know who you are

Fuck you and you suck