Don't Feed the Trolls - Jonathan Coulton

Lucy had a steamboat

Steamboat had a bell

Lucy went to heaven

She still felt like hell

So she only gave it two stars

Worst place ever

She’s the kind of person

Anyway she tries

Always disappointed

So she never feels surprised

When she is always disappointed

She holds my hand

Like I’m a barbed wire fence

Dance like they’re watching you

'Cause they are watching you

And when the bright lights find you

Don’t let your heart get lazy

Keep all the worst behind you

That stuff will make you crazy

Don’t read the comments and don’t feed the trolls (don't feed the trolls)

Don’t read the comments and don’t feed the trolls (don't feed the trolls)

Hello operator

Please give me number nine

If you disconnect me

I think that would be fine

Because all I can hear is talking

So much talking

Appreciate the outrage

I did the best I could

I thought about your think piece

I don’t think it’s any good

And anyway, I didn’t read it

Who writes this stuff?

'Cause it makes no sense

I just checked my privilege

And it looks fine to me

And when the bright lights find you

They’re gonna shine right through you

Keep all the worst behind you

Don’t let the words get to you

Don’t read the comments and don’t feed the trolls (don't feed the trolls)

Don’t read the comments and don’t feed the trolls (don't feed the trolls)

The flies are in the meadow

The bees are in the park

Girls and boys are kissing

As we stumble in the dark

And we don’t have a lot of time left

You clutch your chest, you fake a heart attack

Laugh it up, nothing looks good on me

Somebody called, they want their something back

I’m not a piece of meat, I guess I’d like to be

And when the bright lights find you

Bro, come on, bro, don’t tase me

Keep all the worst behind you

That stuff will make you crazy

Don’t read the comments and don’t feed the trolls (don't feed the trolls)

Don’t read the comments and don’t feed the trolls (don't feed the trolls)

Don’t read the comments and don’t feed the trolls (don't feed the trolls)

Don’t read the comments and don’t feed the trolls (don't feed the trolls)