A Different Paige - Kathryn Hahn

I do too.

If it’s about the title, I don’t wanna hear it.

Okay, never mind.

It’s not a great title.

Cruising down the road and look at me go now

I’m an author, just like Jodi Picoult now

Hit detective series

With Reddit fan page theories

«It's the doctor!»

Former journalist that’s got a new hadline

«Local woman hits paperback big time»

Going on my book tours

Hitting all th famous bookstores

Cramp, cramp!

Check it out, here’s a different Paige

Check me out while I turn the page

Living that good life, knew-that-I-could life

Now, now, now

Look at how now we meditate

Wow, 'cause we’re now on a different wave

Startin' our days with yoga and sage

Like, ow, ow!

Not flexible yet

When I get a call from Hollywood’s number

I pick it up, they say «What up?

And we wonder

Would you be ecstatic if your books were cinematic?»

Cut to:

I’m on a set and giving notes on the screenplay

I’m pounding lattes from the crafty caffeine tray

Acting nonchalant, 'kay

That we somehow cast Beyoncé

Every few months we take vacations

That’s where I get my inspirations

Deep-sea dives, looking fish in the eyes

Like, whoa, whoa, whoa

Then we go to the dolphin encounter

Swimming with dolphins, nothing profounder

Setting them free 'cause they belong in the sea

Like, go, go!

This took a weird turn.

Never thought I’d make The New York Times Best Seller List

Twenty-seven times

Never thought my life could ever be looking like a Nancy Meyers film

Where everything’s cream, cream, cream

The kitchen’s so clean, clean, clean

There’s always pastries on the counter

And it’s like, how did they get there

And how does she have the time to bake?

'Cause I’m amazing

No life looks perfect on the page

I’m grateful for every former stage

And life can be rocky, but look where it got me

Now, now, now

Cruising down the road and look at me go now

I’m an author just like Jodi Picoult now