The Heckler - Loudon Wainwright III

The Heckler heckles and he gibes and he jibes

Listen to him and you’ll make mistakes

He applauds when your guitar string breaks

He’s a heckler and he’s out to get you

Some say he’s drunk and some say he’s stoned

He wants you deposed and dethroned

A crank caller would’ve telephoned

His aim is to upset you

He rarely bites but he can really bark

When those lights go out and that house gets dark

I doubt that he can even double park

But you know, boy, he sure can heckle

And you’re really in for a surprise

When he comes backstage to apologize

And to remind you he’s just to of the guys

Mr. Hyde and Dr. Jekyll

The Heckler heckles and he gibes and he japes

You start to listen to him and you’re gonna make some mistakes

He really hopes that your leg breaks

He’s a heckler and he’s out to get you