Me And My Monkey - Robbie Williams

There was me and my monkey

And with his dungarees and roller blades smoking filter tips

Reclining in the passenger seat of my super-charged jet black Chevrolet

He had the soft-top down (he liked the wind in his face)

He said 'Son, you ever been to Vegas?'

I said 'no'

He said 'that's where we’re gonna go — you need a change of pace'

And we hit the strip with all the wedding chapels and the neon signs

He said 'I left my wallet in El Segundo' and proceeded to take two grand of mine

We made tracks to The Mandalay Bay Hotel

Asked the bell boy if he’d take me and my monkey as well?

He looked in the passenger seat of my car and with a smile he said

'If your monkey’s got that kind of money sir, then we’ve got a monkey bed!'

Me and my monkey

With a dream and a gun

I’m hoping my monkey don’t point that gun at anyone

Me and my monkey

Like Butch and the Sundance Kid

Trying to understand why he did what he did

Why he did what he did

We got the elevator, I hit the 33rd floor

We had a room up top with the panoramic views like nothing you’d ever seen

before

He went to sleep in the bidet and when he awoke

He ran his little monkey fingers through yellow pages

Called up some escort services and ordered some okey doke

Forty minutes later there came a knock at the door

In walked this big bad ass baboon into my bedroom with three monkey whores

'Hi!

My name is Sunshine — these are my girls

Lace my palm with silver baby and oh yeah, they’ll rock your world'

So I watched pay-per-view and polished my shoes and my gun

Was diggin' old Kurt Cobain singing 'bout lithium

There came a knock at the door and in walked Sunshine

'What's up?

You’d better get your ass in here boy, your monkey’s having too

much of a good

Time!'

Me and my monkey

Drove in search of the sun

Me and my monkey

Don’t point that gun at anyone

Me and my monkey

Like Billy the Kid

Trying to understand

Why he did what he did

Why he did what he did

Got tickets to see Sheena Easton, the monkey was high

Said it was a burning ambition to see her before he died

We left before encores, he couldn’t sit still

Sheena was a blast baby but my monkey was ill

We went to play black-jack, kept hitting twenty three

Couldn’t help but notice this Mexican just staring at me

Or was it my monkey?

I couldn’t be sure

It’s not like you’d never seen a monkey in rollerblades and dungarees before

Now don’t test my patience cause we’re not about to run

That’s a bad ass monkey boy and he’s packing a gun

'My name is Rodriguez', he says with death in his eye

'I've been chasing you for a long time amigos, and now your monkey’s gonna die!'

Me and my monkey

Drove in search of the sun

Now me and my monkey

We don’t wanna kill no mexican

But we’ve got ten itchy fingers

And one thing to declare

When the monkey is high

You do not stare, you do not stare

You do not stare…

Looks like we’ve got ourselves a mexican standoff here boy

Huh…

And I ain’t about to run

Put your gun down, boy

Huh huh…

How did I get mixed up with this fucking monkey anyhow?