The Doctor's Song - Sham 69

Plastic dolls in plastic bags

Macho dildos buying shags

When the coppers they appear

In the market you can hear

Tell me Doctor can I buy it

Tell me Doctor can you supply it

Spunky cardboard magazines

You can see it in his jeans

Is it soft or is it hard

It’s been seen in Scotland Yard

Tell me Doctor can I buy it

Tell me Doctor can you supply it

Tell me are you getting it

Tell me are you having it

Doctor Porno, Doctor Porno

Fruity stories veggie looks

I thought I’d read it all in books

Here comes Sally she’s a tenner

Lay some plates and we’ll have dinner

Tell me Doctor can I buy it

Tell me Doctor can you supply it

Tell me are you getting it

Tell me are you having it

Doctor Porno, Doctor Porno

Tell me are you getting it

Tell me are you having it

Doctor Porno, Doctor Porno

You want something that will make you horny

Well have a look at this while I speak to Tony

I’ve got what you want but it’s in the van

I know you’re a naughty man

Mandy, Margeret, French and sags

You don’t get this on teletext

Naked women naked men

Take one daily and come again

Tell me Doctor can I buy it

Tell me Doctor can you supply it

Tell me are you getting it

Tell me are you having it

Doctor Porno, Doctor Porno

Some come in cos they’ve been told

It’s all kosher bought and sold

Yes I think this ones for you

You don’t want one you need two

Tell me Doctor can I buy it

Tell me Doctor can you supply it

Tell me are you getting it

Tell me are you having it

Doctor Porno, Doctor Porno

You want something that will make you horny

Well have a look at this while I speak to Tony

I’ve got one for you but it’s in the van

I know you’re a naughty man