Chief Inspector Blancheflower - The Fiery Furnaces

I wanted to be a typewriter mender when I grew up

But things didn’t work out so.

Sleep

Late in the morning, climb up Mt. Olympia and replace a Return:

But I didn’t get enough good grades

My uncle Peter had the Parthenon Business Machine Remediation outfit

And right there, on the shop floor

Hundreds of electric Selectrics, all messed up

But I didn’t get enough good grades

I had a dexadrine hyperactivity selective

Attend to relevant

Information tempo taken in told to

Mechanism coping concept

Put my head down crumple my paper

Sent to look at the future-job folder-binders

I got distracted by the graphs

In the resource room Mrs. Petorsky re-enforced me:

Raisins from her Ziploc bag

And free time after my target behavior I was positive about:

Tickets, tangibles, chips and stars

Now playing I’m In My Own Little House:

Tickets, tangibles, chips and stars

I had a dexadrine hyperactivity selective

Attend to relevant

Information tempo taken in told to

Mechanism coping concept

Put my head down crumple my paper

After school I was sitting in the sitting room

Looking out at the pavers in their bright orange vests

Holding up the slow-go diamond piece of plastic wood

And I knew that I’d never be any good

And never wear a hard-hat and do things like that

So I joined the police force:

Damp in Dumbarton dip about the 14th of May

The publican dropped me a line thought there had been foul play:

The farmer up the hill came in with his knife

He mumbled something darkly about his young wife

Riding up on the postcoach I thrummed on my notebook

The wind was up, I held on my hat.

I do up my coat, look:

The farmer stumbled past holding his gun

He mumbled something darkly about his young son

About your wife, sir

What about her?

Pray, where is she?

Nowhere you’ll see

Locked him up in the store room of Mrs. McVeigh’s Inn

Take tea up in the manor Sir Robert Grayson

The farmer through the window came in with his sword;

He mumbled out of breath Forgive me m’lord

And after that rustic imposition I took a deposition

I shared a Woodpecker Cider with a local fratricider

Who told me all this stuff and more:

Well I rode up to Springfield on my motorcycle

And I’s gonna stay with my younger brother Michael

Mom’s Oxycontins and the Amstel Light

But I noticed I was doing most of the talking that night

So I got both remotes and turned off the DVD

And said Michael is there something that you need to say to me?

Well I don’t know how to tell you

You can tell me any

Thing that you want 'cept «I started seeing Jenny»:

I started seeing Jenny

My Jenny?

And he looked down at the floor

You know damn well she ain’t your Jenny no more

And I said Get her on the phone

Don’t you think it’s a little late?

No I don’t think it’s a little late

But I went out the room cause I knew I’d better wait

So I went down to her dad’s bakery and she said

I’m gonna go outside take a break smoke a cigarette

I’m still surprised at how mad you get

Well what’d you expec'?

That you wouldn’t try to wreck your little brother’s happiness

And I said Listen to you!

I know what you’re trying to do

And what whould that be?

Mess with Michael’s head as some kind of revenge back at me

So I drove up to Springfield in my wife’s new car

And I went’n had a drink at my buddy’s old bar