How To Be A Country Star - The Statler Brothers

There’s questions we’re always hearing every where we go

Like how do I cut a record or get on a country show

Well, it takes more than just ambition and three chords on an old guitar

There’s a few more things you ought to learn to be a country star

You got to learn to sing like Waylon or pick like Jerry Reed

Yodel like Jeannie Shepard, write songs like Tom T

Put a cry in your voice like Haggard, learn Spanish like Johnny R

Whisper like Bill Anderson and you’ll be a country star

Play piano like Ronnie Mil sap or Gilly or Jerry Lee

Yo-yo like Roy Acuff or talk plain like Ralph Emery

Growl like Conway Twitty, get a red, white and blue guitar

Build a swimming pool like Webb did and you’ll be a country star

Be tall like Sonny James is, tell jokes like Minnie Pearl

Or be short like Jimmy Dickens or play five-string like Earl

Get a hip band like Willie, learn to stutter like M-Mel

Get a cap like Roy Clark wore or a voice like Barbara Mandrel

Be rich like Eddy Arnold, say you’re makin' more than you are

Get a gimmick like Charley Pride got and you’ll be a country star

But if you have no talent and you’re not a male

If you’re built somewhat like Dolly or have a face like Crystal Gayle

Come back stage and ask for Harold, Phil, Don or Lou

And we’ll see you get auditioned for the Statler Brothers Review