Shoehorn With Teeth - They Might Be Giants

He wants a shoehorn, the kind with teeth

People should get beat up for stating their beliefs

He wants a shoehorn, the kind with teeth

'Cause he knows there’s no such thing

He asks a girl if they can both sit in a chair

But he doesn’t get nervous, she’s not really there

He wants a shoehorn, the kind with teeth

'Cause he knows there’s no such thing

Tour the world in a heavy metal band

But they run out of gas, the plane can never land

He wants a shoehorn, the kind with teeth

People should get beat up for stating their beliefs

He wants a shoehorn, the kind with teeth

'Cause he knows there’s no such thing

What’s the sense in ever thinking 'bout the tomb

When you’re much too busy returning to the womb?

He wants a shoehorn, the kind with teeth

People should get beat up for stating their beliefs

He wants a shoehorn, the kind with teeth

'Cause he knows there’s no such thing