A Story - Violent Femmes

I got a story

A sad sad story

About a girl

Who met a boy

About her mother

Whose vision saw her

Daughter to marry

Another boy

(Nooo nooo nooo…)

They made a plan

To get away

To run away

And though it be hard

To make that day

Freely to live

Without the mother

They’d send a postcard

(Nooo nooo nooo…)

Out on the interstate

That’s where they made their mistake

That’s where they met their fate

Out on the interstate

They met a monster

The monster of the interstate

Who will not hesitate

Who eats teenagers

Like a shark eats little fishes

Who eats bad kids disobeying parents wishes

An interloper against the elopers

A troll at the pay toll

They stopped at the toll booth

And reached for a quarter

The monster filled the whole booth

He gave them no quarter

«Don't eat me»

Chirped the girl

Clutching to her purse

«Don't eat me»

Croaked the boy

«Or eat her first

I’ll turn right around

And take her back to her mother’s

We repent of being out of wedlock lovers»

«You should have thought of that before»

And a scaly horny hand

Ripped the car lock door

And the boy

Tried to drive

But oh boy

He was eaten alive

And the girl

Tried to scream

But she was swirled

In the giant’s vanilla ice cream

And the boy was yummy

And the girl was yummy

As they slid down the throat

To the monster’s yellow tummy

He said:

«Hmm hmm good

Didn’t do like they should

Hmm hmm good

Didn’t do like they should»

The mother sold the

Rights to the story

It was so scary

This gory story

They made a movie

A horror movie

The mother made a million

And the producers made a billion

«And that other sweet boy

That my daughter has shunned

Now I’m his wife and he’s my husband»

The moral of this story

Is clear for all to see

And if clearly all can see

Then it isn’t clear to me