Christmas Sweater - Alaska Thunderfuck, Willam, Courtney Act

It’s Christmas

Geez, Christmas is terrible

I’m never, ever, ever, gonna get it together

Dad don’t give a shit

And my sisters say whatever

All good, I’m cool

My mom threw the tree off in the inground pool

Some about something cause I’m underage drinking

It’s easy sneaking liquor when they’re cooking in the kitchen

Woke up, tree side

Got the garbage can lid for a ghetto sleigh ride

And this could be…

(Gingerbread tastes like jäger)

The worst Christmas ever

(Bitch you don’t know a sled)

Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater

Don’t care what Santa brings won’t send him a letter

Make a list and check it twice, it won’t make it better

Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater

My entire family’s on the morning flight to Paris

Night before they punished me and sent me to the attic

(Go to your room!)

Woke up, rolled out

Mum forgot about me on the plane and freaked out

(Courtney!)

Two guys tried to break into my house but I was smarter

Set a bunch of traps, set a guy on fire

Yeah I, nearly died

Mum had to ask John Candy for a ride

Wait a second, that sounds really familiar

No, no, that’s my family Christmas, that’s what happened

Do they even have Christmas in Australia?

No…

Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater

Don’t care what Santa brings won’t send him a letter

Make a list and check it twice, it won’t make it better

Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater

So, there is this one year

And it was Christmas

And my brother got karate patches

And I really wanted to get karate patches

So I thought I was gonna get karate patches

And then I didn’t get karate patches

Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater

Don’t care what Santa brings won’t send him a letter

Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater

(your sweater’s so ugly)

Don’t care what Santa brings won’t send him a letter

Make a list and check it twice, it won’t make it better

(so ugly)

Everything is better in my ugly Christmas sweater

Okay Courtney here’s the part where you sing like Mariah Carey, go, go

No I’m not doing it this year everybody made fun of me last year, y-you do it

Fine I’ll do it okay ready

Why didn’t you tell me you could sing like that?

Happy Birthday Hanukkah!