The Soviet Machine - Chess In Concert

Just in case you feel a trace

Of doubt or even nervous tension

Let me draw the latest score

To your attention

Not the score, the witless score

That commentators are debating

Come, admit, who gives a shit

For Elo rating

No, I prefer

And I’m sure you concur

To see who’s ahead

Psychologically, for example

We have on tap

An inscrutable chap

Whose thoughts never stray

From the state of the play

Viigand!

Whereas…

(sung)

It’s so difficult to concentrate if

You have left your native

Country for a woman who has plans of her own

It’s not easy for a chap to excel

Feeling guilty as hell

Having left his wife to face the music alone

But, even worse

Imagine if his ladies met

Well then I’ll bet

The atmosphere 'round here

Would be a little strained

As she explained

How could he do

What he’s done to those two

Most wonderful girls

Yes, I love you both

Most amusing!

Starting them scratch

They’ll torpedo his match

His horsepower dead

On the board and in bed

Bit by bit the pieces fit

The Soviet machine advances

Not one move that

Won’t improve our nation’s chances

We predict a stunning victory

Both on the board and off it

This will show that traitor

No one rats with profit

But we’re going to smash that bastard

Make him wanna change his name

Take him to the cleaners and devastate him

Wipe him out, humiliate him

We don’t want the whole world saying

«They can’t even win a game.»

We have never reckoned on coming second

There’s no use in

Losing

Bit by bit the pieces fit

The soviet machine advances

We can feel the flame

Of triumph burning

Our people’s pride returning

Not one move that won’t

Improve our nation’s chances

Hoi!

No, I prefer

And I’m sure you concur

To see who’s ahead

Psychologically, for example

We have on tap

An inscrutable chap

Whose thoughts never stray

From the state of the play

La la la la, la la lay la lay la

La la la la la la la la la la la

Bit by bit the pieces fit

The soviet machine advances

Not one move that won’t

Improve our nation’s chances

Hey!

We predict a stunning victory

Both on the board and off it

This will show that traitor

No one rats with profit

Ah ah, la la la la!

From Moscow to the Bering Strait

Citizens will hail our victory

In arctic circles, frozen states

Will join with warmer climes in reverie

And I can say of this affair

I was there

Did my share

Played my part

And comrades all will be aware

I was there

From the start

Mmm mmm…

Ah ah…