Tango - Lady Sovereign

Bring out the bucket, bring out the cloth

Bring out the liquid, bring out the lot

If not, let’s roll her to a car wash (wooah-wooah)

Now washing you will be like washing a goth

All that black lipstick around their gobs

How the fuck do we get it off?

I think this will be a very hard job!

How did you get a tan like that in winter?

You ran off to Boots and got a box of tinter

Didn’t ya?

See, you still got orange fingers!

What network are you on?

ORANGE!

Colour of your bathwater?

ORANGE!

Your favourite fruit must be an ORANGE!

Bitch, did you know you’re ORANGE?

Slap, bang, goes on your fake tan

Bitch you look like the Tango man

Woo-dy woo-dy wooo, do the tango

Woo-dy woo-dy wooo, do the tango

It’s the gone wrong sa-lon…

Your clothes keep ripping like you’re the female Incredible Hulk

You got a broken bra, a broken top, a broken thong and a broken coat

You been wearing the same jacket since you were in year 8

And it smells like you urinate on it bitch…

That ain’t great!

You tried to be Christina, so you dyed your hair black

But really you look like the Vicar of Dibley (wot?) on crack!

Now, just step back and face the facts

You don’t like the fact I get feisty on wax

Anyways talking about wax, look at your face!

Girl, relax!

Why not fling her on the window sill as a pumpkin

When it’s approaching Halloween

Or on your English breakfast, place her next to the bacon

She could be the beans!

And you always know wheres she’s been

And you always know when she’s had a pee

Cause the toilet seat ain’t clean

Cause the toilet seat has an orange sheen!

(Ching!) Bring out the detergent

Scrub that oompa-loompa, it’s urgent

Have you seen her face?

It’s disturbing

How much fake tan are you squirting

Ugh, it’s hurting my eyes!

And your starting to look like the sunrise

And your fake tan’s so ming!

You’re attracting flies!