Taylor Swift Is Stalkin' Me - Ray Stevens

Ooh, I’ll bet she’s in the yard again, I’ll have to call the cops

She follows me everywhere I go, I can’t make her stop

I swear sometimes she’s been inside my house when I’ve been gone

She’s about to drive me crazy, hey!

Let me tell ya what’s going on

Taylor Swift is stalkin' me

(She's a little Lolita, she’s a hussy, she’s a tramp)

She’s stalkin' me

(Makes Delilah look like a girl scout, yeah, she’s a vamp)

She’s probably in the backyard now up in that tall pine tree

With a pair of night vision goggles focused right on me

I swear she’s everywhere I go, you know, it’s plain to see

(I betcha she’s hidden a camera shootin' pictures in 3D)

Taylor Swift is stalkin' me

Oh Lord

I told her, «I Knew You Were Trouble», after all you’re just «22»

She said, «You Belong With Me"and „I'm Only Me When I’m With You“

I’m Writing Songs About You», she said and she even wrote «Our Song»

Then she turned «Mean"and said no one’s as «Cold As You"when I told her I was

moving on

And now Taylor Swift is stalkin' me

(She's a little Lolita, she’s a hussy, she’s a tramp)

She’s stalkin' me

(Makes Delilah look like a girl scout, yeah she’s a vamp)

She’s probably in the backyard now up in that tall pine tree

With a pair of night vision goggles focused right on me

I swear she’s everywhere I go, you know, it’s plain to see

(I betcha she’s planted a bug up under the rug that you can’t see)

She’s stalkin' me!

Hey!

Somebody!

Help!

Woaaaah

Ya know «This Is Really Happenin'», I’m being stalked by a «Super Star»

She said that our «Love Story"has put «Tears On Her Guitar»

Her face is all over my TV screen and on the cover of all my magazines

I see her everywhere I go, you know, this has gone too far

Taylor Swift is stalkin' me

(She's a little Lolita, she’s a hussy, she’s a tramp)

She’s stalkin' me

(Makes Delilah look like a girl scout, yeah she’s a vamp)

She’s probably in the backyard now up in that tall pine tree

With a pair of night vision goggles focused right on me

I swear she’s everywhere I go, you know, it’s plain to see

(I betcha she’s got a big hat pin and a voodoo doll of me)

You know, she’s stalkin' me!

I know I’m a hunk, girls' been chasing me since «1989»

I can’t help it if I’m a hottie, it’s a curse

I told her «We Are Never Getting Back Together»

But she’s not believing me

She’ll «Jump Then Fall», text, Twitter and call

She just keeps on bothering me

I know nobody believes me but you just up in that pine tree

There she is with them goggles on

I tell you — Taylor Swift is stalkin' me

What?

That’s not her?

It’s a what?

A hootie owl?

Hey, let me see them binoculars

Oh, well, who’d a thunk it

My bad!