That Frank - Stephen Sondheim

GUEST

I said, «Frank, this picture is a watershed…»

GUEST

I said, «Frank, one day you’ll run my studio…»

GUEST

I said, «Frank, will you listen to that response?»

GUEST

I said, «Frank really knows what the public wants.»

TYLER

I said, «Frank, this picture is a watershed…»

MARY (spoken)

Know what I’m having?

GUEST

What?

MARY (spoken)

Not much fun

FRANK

Party!

GROUP I

That Frank —

JEROME

The guy is too much —

FRANK (spoken)

Hey, the party’s inside!

GROUP II

That Frank —

FRANK (spoken)

You like the picture?

TERRY

The platinum touch

FRANK (spoken)

How about some champagne, huh?

GUEST

He has taste, he has talent —

GUEST

Is he the best?

GUEST

Plus a fine head for business

GUEST

The man is blessed

ALL

That Frank!

RU (spoken)

So what do you do?

GUEST

He’s full of advice

MARY (spoken)

I drink

GROUP II

That Frank —

RU (spoken)

No, no, no, what do you really do?

ALL

And god, is he nice!

MARY (spoken)

I really drink

GUEST

What a friend —

GUEST

What a host —

GUEST

And his work is great!

GUEST

Has a wife who is gorgeous —

MEN

A son who’s straight

ALL

He’s the type you could easily learn to hate

That Frank!

FRANK

Who says, «Lonely at the top?»

I say, «Let it never stop!»

It’s our time coming through

All our dreams

Coming true.

Working hard, getting rich

Being happy —

There’s a switch!

GROUP I

That smile —

GUEST (spoken)

Don’t you miss writing music?

GROUP I

He’s hot but he’s cool

FRANK

That was the old Frank Shepard

GROUP II

What style —

GUEST (spoken)

This guy’s the American dream!

GUEST

And what a great pool!

GROUP I

If you had no idea what

Charisma meant —

GROUP II

And you just can’t be jealous, he’s such a gent —

ALL

He’s the kind of a man that

You can’t resent, that Frank!

GUEST

I said «Frank, you’re coming down to Mexico…»

GUEST

I think Frank is moving back to Paramount…

MARY (to the Audience)

These are the movers, these are the shapers

These are the people that fill the papers

GROUP I

… Mexico…

MARY

These are the friends of Frank

GROUP II

… moving back to Paramount…

MARY

Each one a perfect blank

ALL

When you see a movie that successful, What can you say?

(to Frank) Congratulations!

FRANK

Thank you!

MARY

These are the movers, these are the shapers

These are the people that give you vapors…

FRANK

Twenty years ago, who’d have guessed, who’d have guessed

We’d be standing here?

God, we would have been so impressed!

Now we’re here with the most —

GROUP I

… Mexico…

FRANK

— Brilliant minds on the coast

GROUP II

… Moving back to Paramount…

FRANK

And notice who is their host

GROUP I

… Mexico…

GROUP II

Beautiful, Frank!

GROUP I

… Acapulco, Mexico…

GROUP II

Beautiful, Frank!

ALL

When you’ve made a movie that successful, where do you go?

FRANK (spoken)

Uhhh — Paramount!

GUEST (spoken)

I heard a reliable rumor that you’re selling the Malibu house?

FRANK (spoken)

You don’t want it.

The place doesn’t even have a pool

MARY (spoken)

No pool!?!

In my rat’s hole in New York, the john is terminally busted and the kitchen

should be condemned

But no pool!?!

Trash it!

FRANK (spoken)

Let’s have some coffee, Mary

ALL

Poor Frank —

MARY (spoken)

I never drink coffee

ALL

He handled that well

MARY (spoken)

Caffeine isn’t good for you

GROUP II

That Frank —

FRANK (spoken)

I’m aware this is just a formula picture

GUEST

He’s loyal as hell

FRANK (spoken)

But my next movie.

You wait

MARY (spoken)

I gave up waiting

ALL

He’s polite and considerate, rain or shine —

MARY

It began when I tasted communion wine —

ALL

That Frank

FRANK (to Guests)

Who says, «Mustn't go too far»?

I say, «Look at where we are!»

It’s our time, coming through —

I say, «Good, me and you!»

I say, «Roll!»

I say, «Ride!»

I say, «Hey, there’s food inside!»

ALL

That Frank —

GUEST (spoken)

Your movie was fun!

ALL

You’d think he’d relax

GUEST (spoken)

It’s what the public wants…

ALL

Not Frank —

GUEST (spoken)

Frank understands commercial!

ALL

He’s laying new tracks

GUEST (spoken)

And Frank made a star!

ALL

If you had no idea what

Charisma meant —

And you just can’t be jealous

He’s such a gent —

He’s the kind of a man

Could be president

That Frank!

That Frank!

That Frank!