That Was a Year - Stephen Sondheim

How you doin'?

Stanley Ketchel, fighting Sailor Boy MacKenzie for the title

For the middleweight crown

We bought his contract for a measly fifty thousand

Hiya, Willie!

Just great!

Who’s there?

For the title?

We did?

Remind me, when exactly did we find-

I’d just like to say thank you to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ,

to my sainted mother, may she rest in peace, and most of all to the greatest

manager a fighter ever had: Willie Mizner!

(sung)

Willie had style

Willie had brass

Willie said «Stan, I’m gonna give you some class»

Taught me to dress

Made me a sport

Gave me social status, and something to snort

Learned a lot from Willie;

havin' laughs, gettin' tight

Coked 'til we were silly by the dawn’s early light

Learned so much from Willie I forgot how to fight!

But, oh, what a year

That was a year!

God, I love this town!

Don’t you love this town?

It’s got all of these

Opportunities

Can’t afford to turn them down

Some may not work out

Some go up the spout

Many more around the corner

And what’s waitin' 'round the corner

Isn’t that what life is all about?

(He is talking on the phone.)

I know you’re busy, Willie, I read the papers.

But Mama thought she was gonna

see you Sunday, and she-

…this Sunday?

You’re sure?

Addie, you won’t believe it: your brother’s written a Broadway play!

Willie had wit

Willie had brains

Willie had contacts in the lower domains

Knew how they lived

Knew what they’d say

That’s why I said, «Willie, let’s right a play!»

But where the hell was Willie came the time to rewrite?

Way the hell in Philly, off promoting some fight

Half a play with Willie closes opening night!

But, oh, what a year

That was a year!

You’re saying I invested in this play?

God, I love it here

Don’t you love it here?

Every place you look

Is an open book

Every street a new frontier

If you sizzle, swell!

If you fizzle, well, nothing fails for long

If it doesn’t fly, it doesn’t

And it’s time to sing another song

Broadway Willie

Prince of bon vivants

Everybody wants

Broadway Willie Mizner!

Not some silly

Low-lifes and DuPonts

Cops and debutantes…

(He is on the phone again.)

You didn’t make it last Sunday, or the Sunday before, Willie.

What makes you

think you’re gonna make it this-

Fine.

I’ll tell her

Look at this picture, dear, your brother kissing a racehorse!

Willie and me, we had a run

Doing some things we shouldn’t of done

'Til we get rumbled for some race we tried to fix

Willie says, «Kid, I’m your support

Let me explain things to the court»

So he explains and beats the rap

And I get sent up for six!

Now I write a show

It doesn’t get on

Offer me some dough

I dive like a swan

Once I was a pro

And now I’m a con!

But, oh, what a year!

That was a year!

From the mayor to the cop on the beat

Who’s the only guy they all wanna meet?

Who’s the man they call the king of the street?

Good time Willie Mizner!

When you write about New Yorkers of note

Who’s the wittiest by popular vote?

Always ready with a quip or a quote!

Be nice to the people you meet on the way up… 'cause they’re the same people

you’re gonna meet on the way down!

Night club fillies

Writers, racketeers

Everybody cheers

Good time Willie Mizner!

Ziegfeld lilies

Pimps and financiers-

Willie had style

Willie had gall

Willie had ladies 'round the block and down the hall

Perfect in looks

Perfect at sex

Not so goddamn perfect at forging my checks!

Sure I lost the crown, but

I made lots of green

Sure, he took his time, but

We wrote a great scene

I was voted biggest wit

In cell block eighteen!

Thanks to Willie Mizner!

Nimble Willie Mizner!

Sharp as a hawk

Cock of the walk

You’re tellin' me…

King of Noo Yawk!

Stick around with Willie

You run out of luck

Stick around with Willie

You feel like a cluck

Stick around with Willie

You’re gonna get stuck!

But you’ll get a year-

Maybe ten to twenty

You’ll have a year!

One was more than plenty!

You’ll have the time

Of your life!

God, I love this town!

Broadway Willie:

King of New York!